Please, please brain, let me forget. This desperate plea, was so simple and yet, to me if it was answered, would mean the whole world and over.
With an unheard boom of thunder the dour clouds began to release their tears upon the dry and dirty Earth.
The sound of the downpour drowned out my screams as I bent over, trying to hold the cries in. I clutched the sides of my head, wanting to claw the memory from my mind; if only it was that simple.
"It never happened; it was only a nightmare, only a nightmare. It never happened." I repeated, over and over, hoping if I said it enough I'd truly believe it. However, can the mind really lie to itself?
The rain pounded on my back, but I hardly noticed as my tears mixed in with the bone chilling rain. The sky suddenly lit up with a scar of lighting and then returned to its former darkness.
I threw back my head and let out a wail that seemed to echo through out the country. I weakly wrapped myself in my own arms as I slumped against the steady brick wall and continued to be racked by the sobs that were ripping me apart. This wasn't fair already and now the only thing I wanted was to forget.
I wanted the rain to wash away my memory. I wanted to be a blank slate again. I wanted anything, but this memory. I wanted this memory to become like perfection, always teasing, always seeming like a possibility, but always slipping from your fragile grasp, making sure you never really know what it truly is.
Finally reaching the ground I hugged my knees to my tight chest and looked up at the clouds. The clouds seemed to drag themselves along and they didn't show any signs about whether it would stop or not.
I surprisingly didn't mind the rain, it actually it made me feel numb and unsettlingly calm. Closing my eyes, I let the rain numb the rest of me, hoping maybe it would consume this soul shattering memory.
Somehow the rain felt like it was cutting right through my body and yet it felt like it was a strong embrace, calming my fears. I smiled at this bizarre feeling.
It was so strange. I was shockingly so calm. Out here in this freezing, drenching rain, I was at peace.
This chill, this iciness, this cold tingle, began to form in the back of my head. I didn't think much of it until I couldn't remember why I was sitting out here in this rain.
Confused, I stood and looked for some sort of shelter. Spotting a building rather quickly, I began to run toward it, occasionally spinning around in a circle.
I stepped into the building thinking, "Now if only I could remember what I was doing out in the rain."